BECOMING A FREE BIRD

The other night, I was searching YouTube for something to listen to and chose FreeBird by Lynyard Skynyrd. Like many of us, I knew the lyrics. Lip-syncing them in the car, I silently contemplated how the character in the song was calmly leaving the girl. Pondering the emotional apology, I wondered how he remained so determinedly unscathed.

The words “Lord knows, I’m to blame” took complete responsibility for it all. Then, songwriters Allen Collins and Ronnie Van Zant framed the whole incident simply by, “Cause I’m a free bird now”. The singer self-identified as simply being born that way, a free bird.

That’s it! By saying, “I’m to blame” and then framing it as just who he was…”a free bird”, he took control of the situation and his feelings.

It powerfully hit me. If I completely stop blaming others for any of my feelings, I will always be completely in charge of how I take anything. No matter what someone says or does, I can effectively decide the intention and meaning of the experience.

Completely taking responsibility for our thoughts and deciding the reason why something is happening allows us freedom to act not react. We get complete rule over our emotions and reactions. This realization flooded my body with a long breath of relief. I could finally master all of my so-called ‘triggers’.

You are probably thinking “BS”

But, just think of how completely in-command you would be if you dictated the meaning of every experience no matter how small. Actually, you already do! Unfortunately, sometimes we choose less than positive ways to look at things. If you don’t control what you think and feel, who are you allowing to control them?

Taking control of your thoughts and feelings is a key mindset.

Like Cher realizing who she was and Nick recognizing his mission in the last blog, the traits and purposes we associate with construct our self-identities. We change and develop how we see ourselves through experience and practice. Our mindset and self-identity not only shifts how we feel, it can change us physiologically and epigenetically. According to Stanford’s Alia Crum, how we believe and see things literally changes how we use our DNA to build our bodies. Believing we are in control and taking responsibility for what we think and feel can truly transform our bodies, minds, and spirit-hearts.

The next lyric is critically important. “And this bird you cannot change”. So true! We can’t change anyone except ourselves. Innately, we know this and yet a lot of us still keep trying. Stop! Don’t waste your time. Each person has the right to choose. We can only choose who we are.

So what happens next in the song?

Ultimately, after declaring his free bird status, he abdicates the throne of control with the lyrics, “Lord knows I can’t change. Lord, help me, I can’t change. Lord, I can’t change”. Does he really desire to change or is it a way of throwing off the responsibility of his actions? It’s how he sees himself. He’s got too many places he wants to see, Right? We all choose.

If you have any questions or want to easily take control of habits or negative emotions, simply click below to book a complimentary call.